Is someone you know
​experiencing domestic violence?

Maybe you’ve noticed some warning signs, including: ​​

• Their partner puts them down in front of other people
• They are constantly worried about making their partner angry
• They make excuses for their partner’s behavior
• Their partner is extremely jealous or possessive

• They have unexplained marks or injuries
• They’ve stopped spending time with friends and family
• They are depressed or anxious, or you notice changes in their personality

How to Support a Friend
​Experiencing Domestic Violence

Most
​Importantly

 If assisting a friend to leave an abusive relationship, proceed with extreme caution, because intervention is potentially dangerous to you both. When approaching this difficult subject, proceed with patience, sensitivity, and respect. Otherwise, your advice is likely to be rejected and a relationship wall erected between you and the victim.

Learn more about leaving safely

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Learn More About Domestic Violence

If someone you love is being abused, it can be so difficult to know what to do. Your instinct may be to "save" them,  but it’s not that easy. After all, there are many barriers to leaving abusive relationships, and leaving can be a very dangerous time for a victim. Click below to learn more about domestic violence. 

Learn More about domestic violence

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Support Their Decisions

​The individual experiencing domestic violence is the expert on the violence in their life. They have the best sense of whether their partner will carry through on their threats if they report, goes to work, pursues child support, etc.  Anyone seeking to help a victim of domestic violence must encourage and respect the choices they makes. This reinforces their autonomy and can empower them with the knowledge that they can survive outside of their abusive relationship.

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Know the Resources Available to Them

Find a local domestic violence agency that provides counseling or support groups. Call us at
​(970) 351-0476 to get a referral to one of these programs near you. Offer to go with them. If they have to go to the police, court or lawyer’s office, offer to go along as moral support.

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Lastly, Support Yourself

There is no right or wrong way to feel after a survivor discloses to you their story. In some cases, hearing the details of our loved ones' trauma can be traumatic for those supporting them as well. A secondary survivor is someone who is close to the survivor and may experience some of the same side effects such as personality changes, depression and emotions related to the trauma. You may experience some of these side effects or you may not.  The important part to note is that it is normal. If you are not experiencing these reactions, it doesn’t mean you are a bad friend. If you are experiencing them, it doesn’t mean you are taking anything away from the survivor.
​For more information and resources for secondary survivors, please call us as (970) 351-0476.