Barriers to Leaving

Domestic violence doesn’t always end when the victim escapes, tries to terminate the relationship, and/or seeks help. Often, abuse intensifies because the abuser feels a loss of control over the victim.  In fact, leaving an abuser is the most dangerous time for a victim of intimate partner violence.  A victim's reasons for staying with their abusers are extremely complex and, in most cases, are based on the reality that their abuser will follow through with threats; the victim may not be able to safely escape or protect those they love. 

Here are some examples that might prevent a victim from leaving an abusive relationship:

Personal Barriers

• Embarrassment/shame
• Fear judgment or stigmatization
• Low self-esteem
• Limited financial resources
• No transportation
• Lack of education, work history and/or job training​​​

• ​Fear of revenge/retribution
• Belief that abuse is normal
• Want the abuse to end, but not the relationship
• Feel isolated, depressed and helpless
• Not aware that help and services are available
• ​Love

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​Social and Cultural Barriers

• ​Cultural or ideological beliefs that enable/justify abuse
• Male privilege
• Traditional gender roles and expectations in relationships
• Lack of validation and support from friends and family
• Cultural or ideological beliefs that reinforce staying in the relationship and "making it work" no matter what
• Geographic and/or social isolation from other communities and different ideological perspectives 
• Language barriers

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Societal Barriers

• Affordable housing
• Needs but is not eligible for social services
• Limited employment opportunities 
• Inefficient public transportation 
• Lack of translation services
• Lack of affordable childcare options
• No domestic violence shelter or victim support services in the area

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Legal

• Fear of arrest /loss of child custody
• Lack of victim support by law enforcement 
• Reluctance to prosecute cases
• Probation and/or fines are more common than jail time
• Abusers can easily return and repeat abuse
• High cost of legal representation
• Fear of deportation
• Struggles with substance abuse